England's goalkeeper since Gordon Banks

Consistent, reliable, a safe pair of hands

But despite all his saves and all his acrobatics

I can't help recalling something more dramatic

Of an incident in the back of a car

When Shilts was caught with his bottom bare

And the image of him and his apparent agility

Will stay with me longer than his goalkeeping ability

Bare! Caught with his bottom bare!

Bare! Caught with his bottom bare!

With his bottom bare, he was caught with his bottom bare!

With his bottom bare, he was caught with his bottom bare!

With his bottom bare