She's fuddled my fancy, she's muddled me good

I've taken to drinking, and given up food

I'm buying an island, somewhere in the sun

I'll hide from the natives, live only on rum



I'm selling my memoirs, I'm writing it down

If no one will pay me I'll burn down the town

I'll rent out an aircraft and print on the sky

If God likes my story then maybe he'll buy



I'm buying a ticket for places unknown

It's only a one-way: I'm not coming home

She's swallowed my secret, and taken my name

To follow my footsteps and knobble me lame