Well, I'm a lonesome schoolboy

and I just came into town

Yeah, I'm a lonesome schoolboy

and I just came into town

Well, I heard so much about London

I decided to check it out



Well, I wait in Leicester Square

with a come-hither look in my eye

Yeah, I'm leaning on Nelsons Column

but all I do is talk to the lime



Oh where can I get my cock sucked?

Where can I get my ass fucked?

I may have no money,

but I know where to put it every time



Well, I asked a young policeman

if he'd only lock me up for the night

Well, I've had pigs in the farmyard,

some of them, some of them, they're alright

Well, he fucked me with his truncheon

and his helmet was way too tight



Oh where can I get my cock sucked?

Where can I get my ass fucked?

I ain't got no money,

but I know where to put it every time



I'm a lonesome schoolboy in your town

I'm a lonesome schoolboy