Bill Payne, Lowell George



Crazy Captain Gunboat Willie

Growled out his commands

And all the able seamen

Clicked their heels and swore

They would protect the noble ship

In peace-time and in war



And they danced a jig until the dawn

Sang a loyal sailors song

Drank a pot of steaming rum

Did all the things that loyal sailors do



Captain Bill expressed great glee

All the things that he had planned

Were made to go his way

All the fares he had collected and salted away

Made his lips turn in a smile



Just then Luke the rat from down below

Called to Gunboat Bill

He said

Listen to those madmen wail

They've been at sea for ninety days

Without the sight of land

No it doesn't look so good to me

No it doesn't look so good at all



The captain pondered what the rat had said

Until he could think of nothing more

Then he threw his crew into the foaming sea

At least a thousand miles from shore



And he danced a jig until the dawn

Sang a loyal captain's song

Drank a pot of steaming rum

Did all the things that loyal captains do



The rat looked hard at Gunboat Bill

And he said in a serious style

As he leapt into the water

Don't believe, no don't believe

Don't believe everything that you hear