Shary: If there's a task that must be done,

Don't turn your tail and run,

Don't pout, don't sob,

Just do a half-assed job!



If... you... cut every corner

It is really not so bad,

Everybody does it,

Even mom and dad.

If nobody sees it,

Then nobody gets mad,

Bart: It's the American way!



Shary: The policeman on the beat

Needs some time to rest his feet.

Chief Wiggum: Fighting crime is not my cup of tea!

Shary: And the clerk who runs the store

Can charge a little more

For meat!

Apu: For meat!

Shary: And milk!

Apu: And milk!

Both: From 1984!



Shary: If... you... cut every corner,

You'll have more time for play,

Shary & OFF: It's the American waaaaay