Have you heard about the latest craze

That's sweepin' across the nation

All the punks from coast to coast

Have discovered an old invention:



"Your hair's too long

Man, you're a queer

You're too new wave

Put down that beer:"

and

Do the Slag-Look at 'em run

Do the Slag-Hey you scum

Do the Slag-Ain't it fun

Do the Slag-Let's all be dumb

Badmouth people we don't know

Make sure it's behind their backs

Don't let new people in our scene

It's more fun than having a friend

We'll slag everyone each and every night

So we can pretend that we're all right

Make those pricks feel just so small

We'll show the world that we're three feet tall



Slander their integrity

Doubt their humanity

Talk about their haircuts

Are their politics correct?



Do the Slag!

Don't let those sissies on the floor

They're unhip, man, they bought the wrong clothes

Let's all do the latest craze

'Cause having allies never pays

We'll slag everyone each and every night

So we can pretend that we're all right

Make those pricks feel just so small

We'll show the world that we're three feet tall