[Words and music by Irving Berlin and Vincent Bryan]



[1st verse:]

Down below the Dixie line in Alabam'

Lived a lovin' piano player, Ephraham

'Cause he never took a lesson

He had ev'rybody guessin'

How he played with such a lovin' tone

Any old piano that he could annoy

Ephraham would call an instrument of joy

When it came to make a piano

Cry out in a fancy manner

Ephraham was in a class alone



[chorus:]

Ephraham played upon the piano

Ephraham, he had a great left hand

Ephraham in his fancy manner

Made an upright sound like a "Baby Grand"



[2nd verse:]

Any kind of music he could understand

Still he didn't play by ear, he played by hand

When he started fishin'

For the tune that you'd been wishin'

Ev'ry other good musician stepped aside

Ephraham was never known to lose his head

I remember once a certain lady said

"Can you play a fiddle, Mister?"

He looked up and answered, "Sister

I don't know because I never tried"