Herbicides.

Pesticides.

Fungicides.

All in the name of a greener lawn.





Call Lawn Doctor.

and spread it around.

Have the greenest lawn

in your suburban town.



When Lawn Doctor

raises the rates,

That's when

you do it yourself.



Dig a few holes,

So to plant some brie.

Bags of lime,

Well, don't forget the mulch.



(Chorus)

Chemicals. Chemicals.

More and more chemicals.

Chemicals. Chemicals.

Armchair quarterback on Sunday.

Chemicals. Chemicals

Lawn care specialist on Saturday.

Chemicals. Chemicals. Chemicals. Chemicals.

All in the name of a greener lawn.



When it hits

the groundwater

I know

You won't care.



You'll stay

Comfortably

In your

Lawn chair.



A greener lawn

Is all you want.

A greener lawn

That's all that counts.



(Chorus)





(Bridge)

Bet'cah beat your wife when a weed grows in.

Bet'cha beat the kids when they play on the lawn.

Bet'cha beat your wife when a weed grows in.

(I) Heard you shot your dog, 'cause he shit on the lawn.







Chemicals. Chemicals. Chemicals. Chemicals.

Chemicals. Chemicals. Chemicals. Chemicals.

And I'm gonna take my car and tear up your lawn!