alright, ralph...happy birthday...you freak...

you're breakin' hearts and you're breakin' guitars

today's your birthday and you don't even know how old you are

you're in love with every woman from tyler

you went swimming in the ocean with my goddamn dialer

you used to be fat, i think then i liked you best

'cuz now you're skinny, i'm chubby, and you make fun of my breasts

and i'm sorry, but this may sound weird

but you gotta do something 'bout the food in your beard



Chorus

happy birthday, ralph

i love you

even though you are fu¢kin' disgusting

happy birthday, ralph

i love you

even though you are fu¢kin' disgusting



Bridge

you can't WEAR YOUR BIKER HAT because of your hair

wherever you go, u break everything everywhere

this year 6th GEAR now get on your way

TURN OF THE STEREO CHORUS

AND THE DIGITAL DELAY



some people, they think, they think you're rostafarian

and they ask you for pot

i think i like it, i know i like it

i like it a lot because, because it pisses you off

so for your birthday

i got you some hawaiian punch on tap

age p.o.t.

so now you can stop borrowing my stuff

and trying your new kung fu moves out on me



Chorus

Bridge



happy birthday, ralph, i love you

even though you have a beard (are fu¢kin')

happy birthday, ralph, i love you

even though you are perverted and weird



Chorus



happy birthday, ralph, i love you