I picked her up at the specified time.

I was dressed to the nines,

and she looked so blind,

in a pink sequin dress,

just a bit too tight,

and I was thinking this could be the night.

At the restaurant things were in full bloom.

She said she had to visit the ladies room.

It may have been just a visit,

but I guess along the way,

she decided that she'd extend her stay.

Did she ever come back?

No she never came back.

and the waiter was laughing as I paid the check.

We were going to go to the discotech.

(Actually at that point, that whole discotech idea,

was pretty much off).

On my way out, though, I chanced to see,

a girl at the bar making eyes at me.

So I said to myself, so this could be good.

We'll exchange smiles, phone numbers, and maybe even fluids.

So I bought her a drink, and I bought her two more,

and I asked her for her number as she walked out her door.

She said, "555-5555 and I live at number 55 drive."

Was it really her number?

No, it really was not,

and a ... is all I got,

when I tried to call it later on.

How'd the date end? Badly.

How'd the date end? Sadly.

It was not a love connection, nosiree.

How'd the date end? Terrible.

How'd the date end? Unbearable.

But that's not all, Chuck, as you will see.

I stumbled around 'til I found another bar,

which was good because I couldn't find my car.

I ordered a scotch and I drank it down,

and I did this several times 'til I lost count.

They picked me up where I'd fallen down.

I was read my rights and brought downtown.

I can't remember very much,

but I think it's safe to say that this date sucked.

How'd the date end? Terrible.

How'd the date end? Unbearable