I'M GOING TO DROWN MY CAT



from Bob Walser, who got it from someone in England



Chorus;

I'm going to drown my cat

And smother it with a pillow

It's pissed all around my hat

And it's gonna have to pay

But I'm not into cruelty,

So when I'm done dissecting it,

I'm sending all the bits to the ASPCA



1. Oh farethee well dear cat (dear kitty?)

You have piddled once too often

I'm off to buy a dog, who is good and well behaved

You never discriminated the place you urinated

So rest in pee will be

The epitaph on your grave.



2. Oh to get you potty trained

I have struggled til my strength

Just like your bladder has been

Drained over walls and rugs and chairs

Your metabolism keeps booming

Because you produce more than you're consuming

It's really quite beyond me, so

Pussy say your prayers.



3. I will take my baseball bat,

Made of the finest willow

And put you out with that

And my troubles at the blow.

but I don't envy St Peter

When he comes to the gate to greet ya

You wait til he's not looking,

Then you'll piddle through his halo.



@animal @humor

filename[ DROWNCAT

DC

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