[church bells ring in background] In today's music news: the ever controversial Tupac Shakur has just released another album under the alias Makaveli. Music insiders are running wild trying to rearrange other artist street dates, in fear of a wipeout in retail interchart movement. Although no one knows the exact cause of the new album; resources tell me a number of less fortunate rappers have joined together in conspiracy to assassinate the character of not only Mr. Shakur, but of Death Row Records as well. Nas, the alleged ring leader of it, is furious at Tupac excuse me Makaveli's verbal assault on Mobb Sleep, Notorius P.I.G., and several other New York rappers Jay-Z, from "Hawaiian Sophie" fame, Big Little whatever and several other corny sounding motherfuckers are understandably shaken up by this release. The question everbody wants to know is -- why'd they get this nigga started? Tupac, rather Makaveli, was not available for comment but released this statement: