Well I wake up this morning I rolled out of bed

I felt like a dog who's been kicked in the head

Checked out my mail there was letter that read

Love for sale, love for sale

I picked up the phone I called everyone I could

I let my fingers do the walking through the telephone book

You can't catch a fish if you ain't got the hook

Love for sale, love for sale

Send up a signal throw me a line

Somebody explain " this funny Valentine"

It might not be signal but it sure ain't a crime

I'm one step from crazy and two steps behind

I called Lt. Columbo from my TV set

I've tried the Dating Game I haven't found her yet

I'm hoping that she's looking like a Penthouse Pet

Love for sale, love for sale

Solo

We've been living together 3 years,

2 hours, 20 minutes maybe four hundred beers

You can't shop for love when you're shopping at, Sears

Love for sale, love for sale

I guess I've learnt my lesson it was easy to see

My old lady she played this joke on me

I never looked where I forgot it would be

Love for sale, love for sale