How would you like to be my son?

How would you like to be my own adopted boy?

(I never liked him much before,

But count the cash that's in the drawer

I've got no choice - I'm much too poor -)

Say yes (what for?) Seymour I want to

Be your dad



I'll gladly treat you

Like my blood and my own flesh

(Like Ozzie Nelson, Dave and Rick?)

Like Honey Fitz and take your pick

(Then kiss me quick, I'll be your son)

Don't make me sick just be my son



Muchnik and Son sounds great

Three words with the ring of fate

So say you'll incorporate with me

A florist's dream come true

Mushnik and his boychik, you-

What business we'll do for F.T.D.



Like Andy Hardy and the Judge

Like Zeus and Mercury

Like Dumas Fils and Pere

(In trouble sickness and in health)

We'll share the plant and share the wealth

I'll call my lawyer (call me son)



Mushnik and Son, that's that

(Officially I'm your brat)

Consider the matter closed and done

Now to the world let's stick

Our senior and junior shtick

(Through thin and through thick)

Through sloppy and slick

Through kiss and through kick

Mushnik and Son!