Pointy teeth as sharp as blades,

Ray Reardon haircut fallen from grace,

Pointy sticks - they make him mad,

'Cos Dracula was our Ray's dad.

Spook, Pery, Snooker Hall

Crowley once challenged Ray to a game

Losing your soul was the paying stake,

Crowley used garlic, brightstone and fire,

'Cos fucking Ray Reardon is a vampire.

Ray Reardon, Ray Reardon,

We are all doomed

Spook, Pery, Snooker Hall

Referee, come clean the white,

Dracula he makes a bite.