Welcome my son to your very first day

So proud to be the one who brought you this way

I love you with all my heart

And my love is here to stay

But I can't help worrying will you eventually smoke weed?



Soon enough you'll be walking

You and me hand in hand

The silly words you'll be talkin'

Only daddy can understand

We'll go out making snowmen

Building castles in the sand

And all the time I'm thinking, will this kid end up smoking' weed?



But time keeps on going

And you keep on growin'

You're now six years old

You're getting so good at your spellin'

But my mind is always dwellin'

On the fact that you could be the kind of guy

Who grows up and needs to smoke weed on the couch

All the time

All the time



So answer me this while you're lying in your little bed

Why must you insist on bein' such a fuckin' pothead?

There's other things in life

That can make you feel good

But you just keep on smoking' your herb

You can't get enough of your precious, precious reefer

Where you getting all this money

To buy so much Hawaiian dope?