When I spot a driver worth a second glance

Foot to floorboard, impact soon achieved

Here comes Bob!

I ain't subtle in my ways of making friends



Girl, this rubbled mess was caused by my neglect

Of course, I'll pay and by the way, my dear

Here comes Bob!

I ain't subtle in my ways of making friends



Sometimes I'll stoop to hitting

Two-door coupes without the frills

But that's just for casual acquaintances,

For stripped-down thrills



Your car, girl -or mine?

It doesn't matter, doesn't matter, no

But for affairs with staying power

I go after limousines



It's always nice if something big

Is acting as your go-between

And for group encounters I'll hit buses,

Mobile homes, or trains to Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania



It's hard to make acquaintances in our big town

Most eyes stare at nothing much at all

But here comes Bob!

I ain't subtle in my ways of making friends

Friends, acquaintances!



Instant adulation comes to some at birth

Born to queens or corporate entities

But here comes Bob!



Someday they'll put me away

I'll think back on active days

Most were worth the minor scars

Some were worth the damaged cars



And the judge will say to me:

"Bob, you've got a bad means to a worthwhile end"



Well, here comes Bob!