Posed like swallows before a dive

Five lanes, and on the left hand side

Stands Tubby Barlow wet with fear

Not quite sure what he's doing there

On your marks, get set, and they're in

Tubby's consumed by the urge to win

Four are greased lightning, one is lard

But Tubby's determined not to be left behind

Ten years of being pushed around flash before his eyes

Alone in the schoolyard eating his pride

In third place as they reach the turn

His arms ache and his chest burns

Kids are cheering from the balcony

Tubby's oblivious, all he can see

Is that this is the moment to change his life

By collecting a trophy on the other side

Past Steven Clough and Kenny Grey

"Mum, mum, I'm winning the race!"

He opens his mouth and water floods in

He's coughing, choking, panicking

Down once, down twice, 'till someone screams

"Sir, Tubby Barlow's drowning!"

But Baz Wilson's already in

Got his intermediate in life saving

The captain of the football team

Idol of every young girl's dream

Drags Tubby towards the rope

But Tubby's confused and grips his throat

As both boys begin to skin

"Sir, Baz Wilson's drowning!"

Tubby opens his eyes for one last time

Sees Baz flailing at his side

Like Jesus after the resurrection

Sees himself as Baz's salvation

Grabs Baz, heads for the side

"Chariots of Fire" playing in his mind

Meanwhile Steven Clough gets first position

But they're all watching Tubby save Baz Wilson

Now Tubby lays like a whale on the shore

Gasping and spewing like a real hero

Like a real hero!